August came around again as it seems to do every year, and like the year prior, I found myself on a mission to Boulder, Colorado to see my three favorite western ladies: Kim, Cat, and "Bayonce" the dog.
This time around, I kept thinking about the feeling of knowing what is right. Not morally right necessarily, but what is right for you as a human living in this world where we are forced to make choices daily.
When you're a kid you are keenly aware of when things are right or wrong, but often times you are too scared to back out of something that feels wrong. Maybe it's because you are scared, feel peer pressure, are unsure if there are other options, etc. It may be a bit shallow to reference pop-fiction when trying to write a meaning blog post about your feelings, but let me tell you, Mindy Kaling's "Is Everyone Hanging out Without Me" is one of my most favorite books of all times. I read it every time I'm on an airplane and unashamedly and laugh out loud over and over much to the dismay of my seat neighbor. Kaling's book is sprinkled with wisdom wrapped up in humor that women of all ages will find useful. One of my favorite stories that she tells is about finding herself on a diving board that was too high for her comfort as a young girl. When she tried to go back down she was scolded by the lifeguard and told she had to jump and could not climb back down to the ground. "All I remember is crazy pain, panicky, ice-cold fear shooting through my limbs. Unable to say, 'screw you dude, I'm going down the ladder, and I'm going to call my mom from the payphone to pick me up and take me home.' I closed my eyes and just let myself fall into the water. The sight of a fat child falling, lifeless, from a high distance into a pond is kind of an amazing sight, I'll bet"
There were plenty of years in my life where I was uncomfortable and I let myself remain in that situation knowing that at some point relief would come. Sure, there are always going to be things that we don't want to do but we have to do, like sit through lectures, or wear high heels to a wedding. But there are also times where we find ourselves in situations where things don't feel right and taking action, no matter how uncomfortable or awkward it may be, is the right thing to do. Once I left a date before it was even close to being over, just because I absolutely knew it wasn't right for me. You know who you are, and you're great, but life is too short for awkward dates with the wrong person.
I realized while in Colorado that a lot of the moments where I feel compelled to take a photo are the moments where everything just feels right. I don't think you have to have some sort of complex artistic philosophy to understand that concept or to have it resonate with you. Why are we always snapping away? We're on a mission to somehow immortalize things, places, people, moments, etc. We capture what feels right, what we want to carry forward.